I have a deep feeling of lack of purpose. It's been more than one year now that I quit with the intention of starting up our own business with this guy.

Before quitting, we'd talked so much, experimented so much, learnt so much, and in preparation for our venture, I'd spent so much money on computer hardware, software, books, and many other required things. For reasons too boring to explain, I haven't been able to use any of that since I quit.

I've been in a limbo ever since cause I even returned my apartment and in practice I left all I had in my country so that we could embark in this adventure.

Ever since, the other guy hasn't even quit his job yet. Every once in a while he helped me find somewhere to stay. He also finds stuff to keep my mind busy, etc.

But none of that feels like what we had talked for so long. Now it mostly feels like I'm just a drag (not an associate), and I'm just around waiting for the grace of his attention. None of the serious stuff we talked so much about have made any significant progress.

Well, I'm probably not a drag anymore. That's because I followed him to this third world country thinking (missled?) that this time while we do something together and get something going, he'd finally quit his current job, which he's been saying forever that he hates. And now, he's going back to the States, while I'm here let's say stuck.

I was very weary of not spending too much money from my dwindling savings on learning the language (in case I don't stay here too long), or in the work visa paperwork. But somehow when these freaking issues seem to start moving... oh, he's going back to the States.

Wonderful, isn't it?

Why did I follow him till the end of the world? Because this is not a regular Joe, he's a truly special guy, a pleasure to work with. But as of lately I just feel very left behind and pretty much like a drag.

Before coming I remember him saying he'd do this and that for me to help me adapt to this country. Not that I'm a baby in need of pampering, but a man should keep his word, shouldn't him? I think that among all those nice offerings, only one came true.

Perhaps it's the local culture of telling you nice things while they're facing you, even if they're plain lies. I've never done that kind of thing, and I've always fulfilled my offers to this guy.